Where a child spends the Christmas holidays can be a very difficult issue to address, particularly for newly separated families. Christmas is a sentimental and treasured time for many and the idea of parting with your children during this time can be really challenging. It can often be a very emotive discussion and one that is difficult to resolve with both parties feeling satisfied with the outcome. When seeking to agree arrangements for children, I am always conscious to think of the Christmas holiday arrangements, in addition to all of the other important occasions such as birthdays and mothers/fathers day.
So what are the options? I often ask people to think about how they will divide the holidays, whether it be Easter, Summer or Christmas. This can be a good starting point so that a child, for example, spends one week of their school/nursery holidays with one parent and the other week with the other. The handover point could be Christmas Day or Boxing Day and the arrangements alternate each year. This very much depends on when Christmas Day falls in relation to the school holidays and often holidays last beyond two weeks. Working commitments of the parents is often a big factor too.
Inevitably, both parents want their children to wake up with them on Christmas Day, this is often thought to be a very special time. Another option is to divide this part of the Christmas holidays so that a child wakes up with one parent on Christmas Day and spends half the day with them before moving onto the other parent. This ensures the special day is shared. Alternatively, rather than moving around on Christmas Day, you can alternate the days each year so that a child sees one parent on Christmas Day and the next on Boxing Day. It is necessary to consider journey times to ensure that the child is not spending excessive amounts of time travelling between homes.
It is important to have discussions in advance about the arrangements for Christmas so that everyone is able to plan appropriately, and your children are prepared for what will be happening.
If you cannot agree the arrangements between you and your ex-partner, then mediation can be a great option. This is where an impartial third party works to help you reach an agreement. This can be achieved with you sitting around a table or in separate rooms with the mediator going back and forth. Correspondence from solicitors can also be a good way to agree and finalise the arrangements. As a last resort, the Court can be called upon to decide arrangements for Christmas. This can be done on an urgent basis if necessary.
If you are having discussions with your ex-partner about the Christmas holiday arrangements for your children or need advice and guidance to go through your options, contact us today using the links below.
