If you have been watching the BBC’s new drama The Split Up, you may have found yourself wondering just how realistic its portrayal of family lawyers and divorce really is.
The programme follows a family-run law firm dealing with divorce and family law cases, bringing together the professional and personal challenges that can come with working in such an emotional area of law.
Of course, television needs drama. Real family law is usually a little less glamorous – and involves rather more admin!
But beneath the drama, The Split Up touches on some very real issues that family lawyers deal with every day.
What does a family solicitor actually do?
When people think about a family solicitor, they may picture someone standing up in court and arguing their client’s case. While court proceedings are sometimes necessary, that is only one part of the job.
A family law solicitor will often spend much of their time helping clients understand their legal position, considering their options and trying to resolve matters without the need for a contested court hearing.
That might mean advising someone who is thinking about getting divorced, helping a couple reach an agreement about their finances, advising parents about arrangements for their children or assisting someone who is concerned about domestic abuse.
Every family is different, which means there is rarely a straightforward, one-size-fits-all answer.
You can read more about how a family law solicitor can help you here.
Does every divorce end up in court?
No.
Whilst the court deal with the divorce process and approve agreed financial orders, many couples can successfully divorce without ever stepping foot in a courtroom.
Even more contested cases that require court intervention can settle without the need for a final court hearing.
Negotiation between solicitors can often help separating couples reach an agreement. Depending on the circumstances, mediation and other forms of dispute resolution may also be appropriate.
That does not mean that court proceedings are never necessary. There are situations where an agreement cannot be reached, or where urgent court intervention is required.
However, going to court is not automatically the goal. Where it is possible to reach a safe and workable agreement, avoiding unnecessary litigation can often be beneficial for everyone involved.
What happens to the family home?
The family home is often one of the biggest concerns when a relationship breaks down.
It is not simply a question of deciding who gets the house. The wider financial circumstances need to be considered, which may include the mortgage, savings, investments, pensions and other assets.
There may also be practical questions to consider. Can one person afford to remain in the property? Does the property need to be sold? What happens if one person wants to stay but the other wants to move on?
These are the sorts of questions that a family solicitor can help a client work through.
And what about the children?
When parents separate, decisions about children can often be more difficult than the financial issues.
Parents may need to agree where their children will live, how much time they spend with each parent and how decisions about their upbringing will be made.
The focus should be on the children’s welfare rather than on which parent is seen to have “won” or “lost”.
Sometimes parents are able to agree arrangements between themselves, with or without professional assistance. Where agreement cannot be reached, the court can become involved and will make decisions based on the child’s welfare.
What about pensions?
Pensions may not make for particularly exciting television, but they can be an extremely important part of a financial settlement.
It is easy to overlook pensions when one person has a valuable pension and the other does not. However, a pension can represent a significant asset, particularly after a long marriage.
Understanding the value and nature of pensions is therefore an important part of looking at the overall financial position.
Why every family law case is different
Perhaps the most realistic part of any family law drama is the fact that there is no such thing as a “typical” family law case.
One couple may have a straightforward divorce with relatively simple finances. Another may have a family business, several properties, significant pensions and complicated tax considerations.
Similarly, arrangements that work perfectly well for one family may be completely unsuitable for another.
That is why getting advice from a family law solicitor can be helpful. Understanding your legal position early can give you a clearer idea of your options and what you may need to consider before making important decisions.
So, is The Split Up realistic?
There are certainly familiar themes.
The emotional impact of relationship breakdown, the complexity of financial arrangements, disagreements about children and the difficult decisions that families have to make are all very real parts of family law.
But, like any television drama, The Split Up has to entertain. Real family law tends to involve considerably more careful negotiation, detailed financial information and paperwork – and rather less dramatic music!
What television can sometimes overlook is that behind every case is a real person trying to work out what happens next.
For someone going through separation or divorce, the most important thing is not having the most dramatic legal battle. It is understanding your position, knowing your options and finding a way forward that works for your circumstances.
Need advice about divorce or separation?
If you are considering divorce or separation and are unsure where to start, speaking to a family law solicitor can help you understand your options and what steps you may need to take.
At E J Coombs Solicitors, our specialist family lawyers advise clients on divorce, financial settlements, children matters and a wide range of other family law issues.
